Why You Should Choose An Uncontested Divorce in Singapore

So you’ve been fighting a lot. Hurtful things said. Colourful language used. Breakable things thrown. Not to mention all that unnecessary name-calling.

Maybe you’ve tried working things out. Maybe you haven’t. All you know is that you want out. It’s been a long time coming and you want out. Now. How you managed to put up with this shit all these years is anybody’s guess.

It may have taken a while to come to the realization that you want a divorce but once you’ve made the decision in your mind, it’s next to impossible to retract. Sort of like Divorce Inception.

The easiest thing to do is to let things continue the way they’ve always been going. But you know better. Enough time has passed and you just know.

So after some Dutch courage, you finally broach the subject. You tell your significant other you want a divorce.

Uncontested and Contested Divorce

Divorces aren’t happy affairs. In most cases, the parties involved just want to move on with their lives as quickly as possible. The fastest way to finalize a divorce is for both parties to agree on all the relevant issues relating to the dissolution of the marriage (i.e. an uncontested divorce).

Unfortunately, while this is often the ideal scenario, divorcing parties in Singapore often find it difficult to see eye to eye on many of these issues. Oftentimes, the residual emotional hurt and pain makes it even harder to discuss the necessary issues rationally and sensibly. One or both parties may feel like they have to ‘win’ the divorce even though the harsh truth is that there are no winners when a marriage ends. You know things have gotten a little out of hand when parties start squabbling over the ownership of a 90’s Backstreet Boys CD.

When this happens, the divorce becomes contested, and both parties will bring their respective arguments in court to settle the outstanding issues.

Why Choose an Uncontested Divorce?

Reason #1: It will save you time.

Contested divorces can take a long time before they’re finalized. If you’ve been trying to make your marriage work for many months, or even years, you’re probably looking for the quickest way to get a divorce. Prolonging a divorce can be hard on you and your soon-to-be ex-spouse. It’s also very hard on your children and extended family. With an uncontested divorce, you’ll save everyone a great deal of time.

Reason #2: It minimizes family conflict

Divorce is difficult, no matter how you proceed. However, especially if you have children, your goal is to minimize family conflict as much as possible. This is a very emotional time for you, your spouse and your family. When you choose an uncontested divorce, you acknowledge that the marriage didn’t work out but that won’t stop you and your spouse from trying to handle the separation amicably.

Discussing and coming to agreements on ancillary matters such as the division of your matrimonial possessions, maintenance of the wife and children, and custody, care and control will promote a healthier relationship down the road. The marriage may be ending but no matter what, you’ll still have to deal with each other to some extent for a long time afterwards.

Leave the acrimony at the door and try your best to come to a consensus with your spouse.

Reason #3: It helps maintain privacy

When you and your significant other come to the terms on an uncontested divorce, you avoid going through the painful process of discovery and interrogatories. When matters become adversarial, the person who once protected your deepest and darkest secrets will usually exploit any matter to gain an advantage against you. Everyone has skeletons in their closet and some of these skeletons can be dragged out and harshly questioned in a trial setting should the divorce become contested.

Uncontested divorces are settled quickly and quietly within the confines of a law firm, with only you, your spouse and a lawyer present. You’ll probably never have to see the inside of a courtroom and anything remotely unsavory remains between you and your spouse.

Reason #4: It helps avoid a trial

A lengthy divorce trial is not only hard on everyone because of the amount of time it takes, but it’s also very expensive. A divorce is difficult enough without adding the expense and anguish of a trial on top of it.

In addition to being expensive, divorce trials also tend to be tedious and drawn out. You’ll spend a lot of time in a courtroom listening to hours of your dirty laundry being aired. Sometimes, a lot of these details will be excessive and not strictly necessary. It’s not unusual for a party in a divorce trial to leave the court even unhappier despite getting what he or she wants.

Reason #5: It is better for the children

Naturally, this only applies if there are children to the marriage. Under Singapore law, the paramount consideration is the welfare of the child. As a parent, it’s also innate to want to make sure that your children are shielded as much as possible from the pain of having to see their parents separate.

Making them go through contested court proceedings will only exacerbate the hurt they’re already going through.

When Would You Choose A Contested Divorce?

Despite the many advantages of choosing uncontested divorce in Singapore, there are instances when an uncontested divorce might not be appropriate.

In particular, it may be better to bring divorce proceedings to court when:

1) There has been domestic violence in the marriage (e.g. when Personal Protection Orders or Domestic Exclusion Orders have previously been taken out).

2) Both parties refuse to speak to each other and negotiations have come to a standstill.

3) One party is susceptible to being intimidated and coerced by the other party.

4) The matrimonial asset base has many valuable and complex assets.

In other cases, you may simply feel that your interests would be better upheld in court proceedings. There are no right or wrong answers here. As any good divorce lawyer will tell you, it really depends on your fact situation and what you’re most comfortable with.

Conclusion

Uncontested divorces in Singapore tend to be fast, cheap and amicable. In many situations, it’s a better choice than bringing the divorce to court.